Remember in high school, when you just wanted to be invited to do things with the “cool kids?” We might get older, but that feeling doesn’t always go away; it just changes sources. Instead of wanting to be invited to a party or lunch, you might just be longing for a phone call or someone to reach out to you. Take heart, that crappy feeling is always going to suck. We’re going to show you how to flip the switch so people find themselves wishing you would invite them to your party.
The pit of loneliness can seem bottomless at times, but we’re here to throw you a rope. Everyone is drawn to do something, even if they don’t realize it or are readily able to identify it. We’ll help you do just that first, then show you how you can draw people to you, instead of wishing they noticed you. See how you already have everything you need to attract more fulfilling, dependable relationships.
Here’s How Fun and Easy it Can Be to Draw People TO YOU!
Call Yourself
You know what’s worse than waiting by the phone? Being the one who isn’t communicating with yourself. Even worse is when you’re actively ignoring your own wants and needs, sometimes because you’re going in a direction everyone else wants you to go. How about tuning in to your own compass and letting others follow you, instead?
What’s Pulling Your Chain?
Here’s the difference between survival and really living. In one case, you have to push yourself to do what has to be done, whereas in the other, you are pulled to do something that makes you happy. Those who resist the pull often find themselves having to push themselves through even the simplest of tasks. So what pulls your chain? We’ll help you figure it out. Do yourself a favor and write down the answers to some of the questions below.
- When you’re in a store, what section are you drawn to that you don’t actually need to be in?
- As you browse online, what topics take you “down the rabbit hole” for hours on end?
- If money didn’t exist, what would you spend your time doing?
- If you could teach a child about any topic, what would it be?
- Let’s assume a degree would land you a job with your dream salary. What would you be doing?
You may have noticed a theme here. It boils down to knowing what you’re really interested in and knowing that no matter what it is, there is a way to make a life out of it. Don’t believe me? Check out these careers from what some may call childish interests.
- Fantasy interests: Costume design, theatrical hair and/or makeup artist, writer, cover artist, dragon sculptor
- Mud lover: Sculptor, geologist, mud spa owner, landscaper
- Anime watcher: Graphic design, fan fiction, storyboard designer, art teacher
These are just a few of the options available, and the same methodology can be applied to just about any interests. When you start to follow that pull to your own interests, you end up surrounded by like-minded people. The more you embrace what you really want to do, the more those people to want to be around you.
What Purpose Do People Serve in Your Life?
As you start developing your interests, you’ll find that you want to waste less time with people and things that don’t fit in the direction your life is going. It’s going to be uncomfortable for a minute, but that’s just a sign that things are going the way they should. Now might be a good time to look at what you really expect of the people in your life.
In some cases, we end up with a specific group of people based on location or genetics. Your cousins might be the nicest people in the family, but that doesn’t mean they have to be a part of your “tribe.” The neighbor who sometimes helps you fill the days with a never-ending cup of coffee might actually be making your life worse since the gossip runs out about the same time as the coffee.
As you spend time with people or think of those you would wish to spend your time with, ask yourself why. Does their presence make you feel more alive or are you just killing time keeping loneliness at bay? This is why you need to be proactive about who is involved in your life.
To find out who really belongs in your life, weigh how you feel before you’re around them or talking to them as compared to how you feel afterwards. You’ll notice that some people just suck the energy right out of you while others leave you feeling alive and motivated. You’ll know which ones you should be spending your time with.
Unpack the Toy Box
The older we get, the more people expect us to “put away childish things,” but the truth is it was much easier to assess our interests as children, before responsibilities and the opinions of others got in the way. Those childish dreams might actually hold the key to what you would be best off doing right now, so give yourself permission to look in the toy box at least one more time.